Can I say something to the dad joke? #23

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.

Obviously, an octopus can show his true potential as a tickler than as a ticklee.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #22

What's brown and sticky?
A stick ... a stick with steam rising.

It looks fresh.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #21

The rotation of earth really makes my day.
The revolution makes the King's day the worst.

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #26

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
Better safe than sorry. That's my motto. I would like to serve in a reliable way rather than run the risk of accidentally pouring the soup on my customer's head.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #20

Spring is here. I'm so excited I wet my plants.

Are you by any chance a small dog?

Can I say something to the dad joke? #19

This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there.

Age before beauty.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #18

Don't trust atoms. They make up everything.

Atoms are a lot like adults.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #38

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To upload a video on YouTube. I watched his video called "Me crossing 'The Road.'"

Can I say something to the dad joke? #17

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

How about taking your hands off the book?

Can I say something to the dad joke? #16

I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.

You shave your pubic hair that grows in the hiding place, but you grow your facial hair. I wonder if you will shave facial hair when you start wearing a face mask.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #15

The recipe said, "Set the oven to 180 degrees." But now I can't open it because the door faces the wall.

Even if you can open it, your meal is still cold.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #31

"Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!"
The waiter silently pointed to the exit.
"Waiter, what are you doing?"
"I'm showing the fly the way out of the fly dish."

Can I say something to the dad joke? #14

Why is Peter Pan always flying?　He neverlands.
When he lands, he is at risk of breaking his leg. The constant flying has caused his leg bones to lose density because they have not been performing their normal weight-bearing function.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #13

Why is Peter Pan always flying?　He neverlands.
When he lands, he is at risk of breaking his leg. The constant flying has caused his leg bones to lose density because they have not been performing their normal weight-bearing function.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #12

"Dad, can you put the cat out?"
"I didn't know it was on fire."
"Dad, even if it's a joke, there are things you should and should not burn."

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #25

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
I'm so sorry. But don't blame my thumb. The reason why it has no choice but to go into the soup is because the other four fingers are too clumsy.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #11

"I'm so good at sleeping. I can do it with my eyes closed."
"You don't seem to notice it yourself, but you're always sleeping with your eyes open."

Can I say something to the dad joke? #10

I've got a great joke about construction, but I'm still working on it, because my boss hasn't given me the OK for a week.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #9

"I like telling Dad jokes. Sometimes he laughs!"----It's been a year since then, all the time he laughs in a picture.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #8

I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and eat it while worrying about diabetic retinopathy.

Untitled #2

Please don't RT. This is fake news.

Trump tells reporter to take wig off during briefing - from CNN

Why did the chicken cross the road? #37

Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because this road is placed first in the ranking of roads chickens want to cross in 2020.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #7

Why did the scarecrow win the award?
Because he was outstanding in his field, even in a heat wave, a blizzard, or a drought, until he was swept away by the flood.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #6

I had a neck brace fitted years ago and I've never looked back since. What I'm looking forward to now is the future where I live without a neck brace.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #5

"I'll call you later!"
"Don't call me later, call me Dad!"
"Former stepfathers didn't say such a thing."

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #30

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
No, what you're pointing at is a sunflower seed, not a fly. The green one next to it is a fly.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #4

Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two tired. The other lively bicycles that could stand up by themselves were all independent and left home. In some cases, only a saddle left home.

Have you ever heard the word BICYCLE THIEF?

Can I say something to the dad joke? #3

Dad, can you put my shoes on?
No, I don't think they'll fit around my head.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #2

I don't trust the stairs. They are always up to something. They always up something, specifically, one step. The moment I go down the stairs and am sure I've reached the bottom, I realize there's no floor there.

You shouldn't trust yourself.

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #24

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
When the sea level rises, something is submerged. It seems that our cook has put too much soup.

Can I say something to the dad joke? #1

How do you get a squirrel to like you?
Act like nuts that tend to be bigger on the right than on the left.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #36

Why did the chicken cross the road?
We don't know. But everyone who lives around here feels that the season has come for chickens to cross the road again this year.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #29

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Why don't you get rid of it? You don't know where it's been.

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #23

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
Actually, considering the characteristics of the human thumb, this is the best way to hold a plate.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #35

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Nostradamus said:
The year 1999, seventh month,
From the sky will come a great King of terror:
To bring back to life the great King of Angolmois,
Before and after Mars to reign by good luck,
And the great Chicken cross the road.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #28

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Don't worry. It's not a cockroach but a fly. Even if you see one fly, it doesn't occur that there are hundreds more lurking.

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #22

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
To my surprise, it is happening exactly that today's horoscope on TV said.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #34

Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because the chicken got a feeling that the shipping date of theirs was approaching.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #27

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
I believe the fly underestimated the heat of our soup.

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #21

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
No, it isn't. My thumb ends where the soup begins.

poorly made Would You Rather Questions #21

Would you rather be beautiful but you don't think so, or be intelligent but nobody thinks so?

Why did the chicken cross the road? #33

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To move from level 1 to level 2. Look! The chicken is coming back. Level 2 seems difficult.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #26

"Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!"
"Lucky for you! This fly is a hi-visibility dry fly, so you could avoid the worst-case scenario. If it were a wet fly, you would have found it when you were almost finished eating the soup."
"If I follow your way, it's not a fly but a live bait."

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #20

"Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!"
"Is there anything wrong? ...I'm sorry, but I can't hear you because I have bananas in my ears. "
"This or that and you in the wrong place. "
"Or..., the right person in the wrong place."
"You can hear me."

Why did the chicken cross the road? #32

Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because there are no other chicken-friendly roads in the area.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #25

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
I'm sorry. I didn't notice the fly because I was struggling to keep my thumb out of the soup.

poorly made Would You Rather Questions #20

Would you rather be the man who always uses the same locker even if someone is using the locker right next to yours, or be that someone?

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #19

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
If I carry 3 or more plates simultaneously, I hold those plates like a PRO. If not, I would like to serve a dish in a friendly way not to put pressure on a customer who ordered only one dish.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #31

Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because the pedestrian push button has been mounted at about 30 centimeters above the sidewalk.

YAHOO! ANSWERS #4

YAHOO! ANSWERS

Generally, butthole burns after eating spicy food. But every time I eat hot taco, my penis burns. What should I do?

Best Answer:Don't touch your penis after eating spicy hot taco or while eating it. Of course, don't let other people who ate taco touch it.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #24

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
The weak don't get to choose how they die.

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #18

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
I often hit my toes on furniture legs and door frames, so I'm hiding my thumb in the soup just in case.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #30

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To offer topics to dad Instagrammers who are not interested in trendy fashion or fancy dishes.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #23

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Don't worry sir, there is no formal way to eat it. For example, you can use your tongue to catch and eat it.

poorly made Would You Rather Questions #19

Would you rather go back to age 5 with everything you know now or with a penis you have now?

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #17

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
Moreover, my index finger is in my nostril.