Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #18

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
I often hit my toes on furniture legs and door frames, so I'm hiding my thumb in the soup just in case.

Why did the chicken cross the road? #30

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To offer topics to dad Instagrammers who are not interested in trendy fashion or fancy dishes.

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! #23

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Don't worry sir, there is no formal way to eat it. For example, you can use your tongue to catch and eat it.

poorly made Would You Rather Questions #19

Would you rather go back to age 5 with everything you know now or with a penis you have now?

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup! #17

Waiter, waiter, your thumb is in my soup!
Moreover, my index finger is in my nostril.